becoming los angeles

i started wearing perfume

well perfume oil

i was influenced okay

it took a while

to find

a signature scent

i know i really fucking fell for it

the allure of being a woman

and for WHAT

attention?

please

anyway

i searched for it

everywhere

in that last bedroom

on my mothers vanity

online

within

but none of those felt like home

not anymore

also dove coconut body wash

is a tough pairing

to create of myself

an olfactory bouquet

and im already loyal

to the brand

fuck

i had to keep searching

because i am a romantic

and of course the whole thing had to have meaning

and ive never been into makeup

and effortlessness was always impossible

and dove coconut body was always so easy

and i use mens deodorant for Christs sake

who am i kidding that i thought

i could ever pull of

the illusion that i had ever been

completely baptized

into the order of my sex

i had settled so hard

for coconut and old spice

i started thinking

my contrarianism was intrinsic

one night i walked

near midnight

on hyperion

my favorite place

my favorite time

to witness my home

and she handed it to me

there i was

white petals and trailing vines

the night blooming jasmine

the fragrance was mine